Chuck Norris Jokes

Xylar13 · 01-24-2008, 04:03 AM

I don't really like chuck norris like some people but the jokes are funny, here a good one, ill post more tomarrow, but im off to bed.

post ur best as well.

Chuck norris once slammed a revolving door.

StealthSigma · 01-24-2008, 04:06 AM

There is no chin under Chuck Norris's beard, only another fist.

Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet as Chuck Norris.

SuperTroll · 01-24-2008, 04:07 AM

Chuck norris doesnt sleep, he waits.

Forun · 01-24-2008, 04:09 AM

a unicorn once kicked chuck...thats why there is nomore around

mrworkwork · 01-24-2008, 04:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SuperTroll

Chuck norris doesnt sleep, he waits.

That's my favorite

And they aren't jokes, they're facts

Latone · 01-24-2008, 02:16 PM

I'm not a big fan either, but i have seveal friends who are. They like to share these:

Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.

The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.

Chuck Norris has to maintain a concealed weapon license in all 50 states in order to legally wear pants.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

and my personal favorite:
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding

Tinasilna · 01-24-2008, 02:39 PM

There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.

Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay's potato chip.

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.

There are my fav highlights of the Chuck Norris facts.

T.

Latone · 01-24-2008, 02:56 PM

Oh.... i forgot about counting to infinity twice.

Why is Chuck Norris so special? That's what i never understood....

br4d137 · 01-24-2008, 03:07 PM

im actually 3rd gen chuck norris karate student...

he pat me on the head once... and i got laid instantly that night...

but anyways here are my favs..

Chuck Norris doesnt teabag someone he potatosacks them

Chuck Norris doesnt have AIDs but he does manage to spread them

Only Chuck Norris can give birth to REAL spartan men

Chuck Norris was once in the beta version on Mortal Combat, but he was removed because every button was a round kick and every move was a fatality.

Otter · 01-24-2008, 03:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Latone

Why is Chuck Norris so special? That's what i never understood....

You better pray Chuck didn't hear that one.

Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

Since 1940, the year Chuck Norris was born, roundhouse kick related deaths have increased 13,000 percent.

Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead decided to punch his way out of his mother's womb. Shortly thereafter he grew a beard.

Chuck Norris has never blinked in his entire life. Never.

Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

Superman owns a pair of Chuck Norris pajamas.

01-24-2008, 04:03 AM	#1
Xylar13 Join Date: Jan 2008 Posts: 177	Chuck Norris Jokes I don't really like chuck norris like some people but the jokes are funny, here a good one, ill post more tomarrow, but im off to bed. post ur best as well. Chuck norris once slammed a revolving door.

01-24-2008, 04:06 AM	#2
StealthSigma Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Kijuju, Africa Posts: 3,436	There is no chin under Chuck Norris's beard, only another fist. Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet as Chuck Norris. __________________ ________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ Last edited by Nichts; Today at 12:06am.. Reason: I joined on the same day as Ritter and Fighter. =(

01-24-2008, 04:07 AM	#3
SuperTroll Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Fro Rly? Fro Rly? Fro Rly? Fro Rly? Fro Rly? Fro Rly? Posts: 810	Chuck norris doesnt sleep, he waits. __________________ If you are part of the 100% of people who read signatures, do not add this to your signature.

01-24-2008, 02:16 PM	#6
Latone Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Someplace interesting... just not where you think is interesting Posts: 1,031	I'm not a big fan either, but i have seveal friends who are. They like to share these: Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean. The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain. Chuck Norris has to maintain a concealed weapon license in all 50 states in order to legally wear pants. When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris. and my personal favorite: Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding __________________ "You cannot simutaneously prevent and prepare for war" - Albert Einstein "Politics is war without bloodshed while war is politics with bloodshed." - Mao Tse-Tung "Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie' until you can find a rock. " - Will Rogers

01-24-2008, 02:56 PM	#8
Latone Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Someplace interesting... just not where you think is interesting Posts: 1,031	Oh.... i forgot about counting to infinity twice. Why is Chuck Norris so special? That's what i never understood.... __________________ "You cannot simutaneously prevent and prepare for war" - Albert Einstein "Politics is war without bloodshed while war is politics with bloodshed." - Mao Tse-Tung "Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie' until you can find a rock. " - Will Rogers

01-24-2008, 02:39 PM	#7
Tinasilna Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Frozen North Posts: 2,139	There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control. Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay's potato chip. Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird. Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants. Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice. Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is. Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship. There are my fav highlights of the Chuck Norris facts. T.

01-24-2008, 03:07 PM	#9
br4d137 Join Date: Jan 2008 Posts: 1	im actually 3rd gen chuck norris karate student... he pat me on the head once... and i got laid instantly that night... but anyways here are my favs.. Chuck Norris doesnt teabag someone he potatosacks them Chuck Norris doesnt have AIDs but he does manage to spread them Only Chuck Norris can give birth to REAL spartan men Chuck Norris was once in the beta version on Mortal Combat, but he was removed because every button was a round kick and every move was a fatality.